Glasgow bird (joke)

Don't want to upset any Glasgow lasses so please don't shoot the messenger Could substitute any part of the country, certainly the North East.

A Glesga Burd goes tae the social tae register fur child benefit.
"How many children?" asks the civil servant?
"10" replies the girl.
"10???" says the civil servant.. "What are their names?"
"Alec, Alec, Alec, Alec, Alec, Alec, Alec, Alec, Alec and.....eh...Alec
"Doesn't that get confusing?" "
Naw..." says the girl "its great because if thur oot playin in the street, ah jist huv tae shout ALEC, YER DINNER'S READY or ALEC, GO TO BED NOW 'n' they aw dae it..."
"What if you want to speak to one individually?" says the perturbed civil servant.
.
.
.
"'at's easy," says the girl... "Ah just use thur surnames"

A think a know her lol.

OOUUCH that hurts, put those claws away init?

My mate's missus was raped twice.
Once by the Man united supporters club and once by the Grenadier Gaurds.
She reported it to the police as being graped the copper said "don't you mean rape"?
She replied "no there was a bunch of em init"?

That could definitely apply to different parts of the UK. Liverpool, Newcastle, most of Essex come to mind immediately

ha ha ha ha, love it, it'll be on my facebook in minutes